The Nu Nollej
By:

Derek Pethik
News item: "A Saskatchewan educationalist asserts that producing rounded personalities is even more important than learning the niceties of grammar."

The Schoolman of course they all praised to the skies;
He was clearly the man for the task
Of bringing the best, whether thought or expressed,
To the earnest young people of Sask.

His learning was wide, and he pointed with pride
To the fact that his pupils were grounded
Not in cruel repression, but in Free Self Expression,
Which, of course, made them very well rounded.

"What’s the use of such fetters as capital letters,
Punctuation, grammar or similar crimes?"
So the Schoolman would cry, and the class would reply
"They are a quote out of tune with the times !"

"Other schools are such shams, with their tests and exams:
But we’ve got our brave Schoolman to bless;
He has kept our minds free of such fiddle-dee-dee,
—Or of anything else, we confess."

But at college embarked, where they had to be marked,
At exam time, just what was their rank?
To say it was zero might slender our hero,

So we’ll call it a (well-rounded) blank.

Respectfully dedicated to The Riverside School Board, its exalted administrators and educational consultants who have lost touch with the reality of the classroom, the daily struggles of their teachers' and the real needs of their students.